I sit with my eyes closed, and bring to my attention relationships, old and new. I observe what comes up. Sometimes it’s just a simple encounter I had with a person I didn’t even know, such as while driving; they wanted to get into my lane, but I was in a hurry and didn’t let them in. I realize that I still carry this with me, maybe I still feel bad about it, I am not sure, but it came up. So today I clean up. I say I apologize with my full intention and let it go. Learning my lesson to be more generous next time, I smile with gratitude at this lesson and move on.
Maybe there are relationships with people that come up that have a greater significance to you, a partner, parent, sibling or friend. You know if there were certain things left unclear. Maybe it’s just a gut feeling, or maybe it just feels that there is something always present underneath when we meet them. Begin by setting an intention in the mind and then go take action. Even if it is a year old, it is never too late to send a note, give a call or best of all say it in person.
Be honest, it might be that they are still hurt from something you said five years ago, but you keep to your self as you “know” you were right, and are waiting for them to take action. It’s not about calculating who was right, not about bringing back old frictions, but about being intelligent, kind and compassionate, maybe even being selfish. You need to clean this out of your head; it will do you and them good. Just imagine that feeling of lightness, of clarity that will come in instead. Wear a smile, bring flowers if needed, bake some healthy morning glory muffins, and off you go.
In the Jewish tradition there is a Day of Atonement (Yum Kippur). Once a year, people wear white, go to temple, and ask forgiveness. You don’t need to wait for a special day. It does not have to be spring for cleaning. Do this periodically, every time you find something comes up, and remember, It’s not about being right, it’s about moving on, showing you power through surrendering, with no need to prove anything. Peace is up to you and me in our little actions.
